Spider-Man Snore
By Craig Kennedy - June 21st, 2008; 3:10 am
The LA Times reports that Spider-Man 4 is coming in 2011.
(sound of crickets chirping)
Since #3 combined at least three potentially good movies into one bad one, I’m not sure what there is left to do next. Plus, they don’t have a director a script or a star. Ah well, they only need a franchise character and a release date. The rest is meaningless.
It’s Hollywood, Jake.
Filed under: Reviews
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Damn. I actually hear crickets chirping with my windows open here at nearly four in the morning listening to the sounds of the creek just outside my home.
I thought since Spider-Man 3 was reportedly so horrible (haven’t seen it myself yet), we’d get at least a few more years than that for a reprieve.
“Ah well, they only need a franchise character and a release date. The rest is meaningless.”
This calls for a Special Studio Pinheads piece, Craig.
No screenplay? “It’ll write itself!”
Oh well.
Ew. Gross. Why?
Lots and lots of money.
Would it be too meta if Charlotte wrote the logline in her web?
“SOME PRICK.”
They should reboot Spider-man 3, you know…just pretend it didn’t really happen and take another stab at it. Just this time, leave out all the Dark Peter/Hobgoblin/Venom crap that didn’t work. There’s a 90 minute Spider-man vs Sandman movie in there that would be pretty good.
Reboot is the new black.
Joel’s idea isn’t bad. Sort of.
The Dark Peter stuff was terrific, in my tiny humble opinion. Too bad it was tied in to the Venom stuff which Raimi really wasn’t interested in and it showed.
Too bad it was also turned ridiculous by Maguire’s Saturday Night Fever moment.
If they get a good script and ONE villain, there’s no reason it can’t be good. SPIDER-MAN 2 rulez.
And I saw the HULK — not bad, not memorable, but a better fight than in IRON MAN. Clearly edited to the bone.
Much better climactic smack-down in The Incredible Hulk, christian, I agree.
Plus, I felt more emotionally involved in the outcome — and felt the tension of concern — because Iron Man and More Giant-Sized Iron Man kept making up so many new rules of fight physics, I lost interest in the aces they kept pulling out of their metal butt-cracks and just settled back to wait for Cooler Iron Man to inevitably win.
The Incredible Hulk felt more vulnerable, and the damage inflicted was more palatable. I never winced once in Iron Man, but sat all clenched up and flinching during the Hulk showdown.
But can we please stop having all these dick-slappings after dark? Eleventy-zillion bucks for CGI and it’s all lit by streetlights?
Po kicked Tai Lung’s ass in broad daylight.
“Too bad it was also turned ridiculous by Maguire’s Saturday Night Fever moment.”
I know, that was terrific. Probably my favorite part of the movie.
I’d agree with you 100% there Ryan. I felt the same way about Iron Man. I think Robert Downey Jr saved that movie from being a minor disappointment and made it rewarding in spite of itself. Clearly whenever he wasn’t talking the script was pretty wooden…I’m convinced he ad-libbed half his lines.
Jeff, I love that you’re carrying the torch for Spider-man 3 but I absolutely can’t agree with you. Tobey’s Travolta impression was my second least favorite scene in that movie, right behind the omelette sequence, although I give him points for giving it 110%.
What can I say, it was hilarious.
The omelette scene was pretty bad, but there were much worse things in the movie than either of those.