Weekend Forecast: 4/16/09
By Craig Kennedy - April 16th, 2009; 12:01 am
“Yes it’s just called Robin Hood and no I’m not playing both characters.
Ask me one more question about it and I’m jamming this pen through your neck.”
Jeff Daniels and Russell Crowe in State of Play
There are a handful of recommended limited releases which should still be making their way around the country including Song of Sparrows, Shall We Kiss?, Sugar and Hunger and it’s a good thing because there’s not much to get enthusiastic about on the new release front.
Opening in wide release:
- 17 Again. Hey look, it’s a movie about an adult turning back into a teenager…again! Had I been at the pitch meeting for this thing, someone would’ve either gotten a letter opener to the juggler or several large Acco binder clips to the scrotum. Zac Efron co-stars with his stupid hairstyle and I’m not sure which one annoys me more. At least the hairstyle doesn’t sing.
- Crank: High Voltage. If the first one was kind of a rip off of Speed, this one must be a rip off of Speed 2: Cruise Control, right? Instead of facing instant doom if his heart rate drops below a certain level, this time assassin Jason Statham’s heart is replaced with a mechanical one that needs constant jolts of electricity to stay pumping! Wait…What? A) That doesn’t even make sense and B) Corey Haim is in it, ergo C) this one does not turn my crank.
- State of Play. Russell Crowe, Ben Affleck, Rachel McAdams, Helen Mirren, Jeff Daniels and Robin Wright Penn in what appears to be a perfectly routine thriller about a journalist (Crowe) investigating a series of murders that might be tied to an up-and-coming politician (Affleck). Kevin MacDonald (The Last King of Scotland) directs. Even if it’s just ok, that puts it well above the other wide release offerings this week though that’s not saying much.
Opening in limited release:
- American Violet. What we have here is another earnest real-life drama ripped from the headlines. It’s about a single mom who is wrongfully arrested in a drug raid in Texas. Most of the reviews single out the performance of Nicole Beharie in the lead, even if they’re only lukewarm on the movie itself. Tim Blake Nelson plays an ACLU attorney.
- Every Little Step. This documentary about the long-running musical A Chorus Line and the recent revival is no doubt a singular sensation…
- The Golden Boys. If I told you this was a movie about three 70-something retired sea captains on turn of the century Cape Cod who try to woo a middle-aged woman, A) would you believe me and B) would you run out and go see it? What if I said it had Bea Arthur and monkeys with eye patches? Ok, there is are no Bea Arthurs or monkeys (as far as I know), but the other stuff is all true. Any takers? Anyone? Bueller?
- Is Anybody There? The trailer for this drama starring Bill Milner (Son of Rambow) and Michael Caine (well hell, you know who he is) gives me a friggin’ toothache, but I’ll allow that the movie itself might not be so bad. Well, maybe it is, but Caine is always a pleasure to watch and Milner was great in Rambow. Here he plays a little boy growing up among the elderly residing at the old age home run by his parents. Not the greatest place for a kid to be a kid, but there he befriends Caine, an ornery former magician living out his last days following the death of his wife. I’ll bet you a thousand dollars Caine teaches Milner a bit about living life and Milner gives the old man a last bit of life in his golden years. Ya think?
- Sleep Dealer. This Mexican sci-fi tale received mixed reviews when it premiered at Sundance in 2008. It paints a bleak vision of a corporatist future where the border between the US and Mexico has been closed off but workers gather in high tech factories to cyber-operate equipment in the States.
Opening in New York:
- Lemon Tree. Hiam Abbass (The Visitor) stars as Salma, a Palestinian widow living on the edge of the West Bank. When the Israeli Defense Minister moves in next door, the lemon grove that has been in her family for generations is ordered cut down as a potential hiding place for terrorists. In order to save it, she takes the case all the way to the Israeli Supreme Court. Writing for Washington Square News, LiC contributor Sam Kresner finds some of the symbolism to be heavy handed and the male characters to be lacking, but it sounds like the performances of Abass and Rona Lipaz-Michael (as the wife of the defense minister) make it worth seeing. The film doesn’t open in LA until May 1st so I won’t get to see it for a few days.
The musical sponsor for this edition of Weekend Forecast is Serge Gainsbourg who brings his swank French sound stylings to La Javanaise. Sure the dude had big ears, but you know he just rolled out of bed where he’d spent a long evening between the legs of a couple of European starlets with names like Astrid and Genevieve. Seriously, do the French go to cigarette smoking school or something? Leave some suave for the rest of us for crapsakes.
Filed under: Weekend Forecast
Sleep Dealer: That plot doesn’t even make sense. Never good when you try to make overtly-political sci-fi that is too convoluted to quantify.
The Golden Boys: If Somali pirates show up to attack them only to be repelled/killed by Navy SEALs, sign me up.
Is Anybody There?: I can see this one coming a mile off. Everything about it makes me cringe…except Michael Caine, who makes me want to see it. Is that wrong?
Crank 2: The Quickening: You know, the Stratham fanboys are all gaga over this one because apparently it basically rehashes the original, but amps up the depravity and ridiculous quotient even higher, to the point where it’s described as a live action cartoon with boobs and gore. Doesn’t make me want to see it, but I kinda respect their willingness to play to the cheap seats. Evil Dead 2 for the WWF contingent.
Seriously though, I’m curious to see State of Play even though I know it will likely disappoint and of course, Lemon Tree sounds interesting for the lead actress alone.
See, now we’re back “in season” and the pickings are a little better, 17 Again not withstanding.
From where I sit they’re actually overwhelming. In addition to all of the regular releases, the 146-film MSPIFF finally kicks off tonight with 500 Days of Summer. I’d really like to see it, but not gonna happen on my girlfriend’s b-day. But I’ll get my movie fill over the next two weeks, that’s for sure.
I did see State of Play the other night and it wasn’t as bad as I expected. I didn’t see the miniseries and I’m not sure what was changed from it, but the movie addresses some interesting and relevant issues and even needles bloggers a bit, haha. I’d have no problem recommending it for people who can overlook some cliches and unnecessary twists. And I wouldn’t say the acting is awful, but Helen Mirren not surprisingly delivers the best performance in only a few minutes of screen time.
If the plot of Sleep Dealer is confusing it’s probably my fault. Every blurb I read went on and on for multiple paragraphs and I finally lost the will to digest it so I offered a sketch – probably inaccurate.
I’m tempted to watch the miniseries of State of Play instead of the movie. I’m convinced the miniseries will be superior and I don’t want to ruin it with a movie that’s just ok. You know what I mean?
I’ve got nothing against Crank 2, but I didn’t see the first one so it’s hard to muster up a lot of enthusiasm. I’ve got no problem with action and boobs and gore.
First of all, friggin’ funny caption.
Second, the State of Play miniseries is in the Jennybee TV Hall of Fame. Great stuff, couldn’t stop watching it. They diluted the heck out of the movie, from what I understand, cutting out its emotional heart, excising subplots willy nilly and making, sure maybe a decent genre picture, but not one that should be called State of Play. I will likely see it on DVD, just for Helen Mirren being brilliant in the role Bill Nighy was first brilliant in. The miniseries is only maybe five hours, so I’d Netflix it, watch it over a few weeknights or one marathon Saturday and then catch the movie if you still want later. The miniseries may spoil the movie, but I hate that the movie is going to spoil the miniseries for so many.
Third, this Weekend Forecast is pretty funny, vintage Craig. Bea Arthur and monkeys with eyepatches, I’d pay to see.
Fourth, there’s nothing here worth seeing (We’ve got several screens of Dragonball: Evolution here, but I’m not counting that), so we’ll be enjoying the ol’ spinning discs or wonder again.
Finally, nice song. Funny you’ve featured father and daughter within a few posts of each other. One of them crazy talented families, they are.
“State of Play” has gotten some fantastic reviews but I’ll be damned if I keep getting it and “Body of Lies” crossed in my mind.
But I’ll be spending all weekend watching screeners for a local festival, so I won’t be going to the movies at all this weekend. Looks like it’s a good weekend to do that, too.
If State of Play (and the original IS fantastic) was directed by a Scott, then I’d skip it. As it is, I’m giving it a chance, if for no other reason that I’m happy to see Russell Crowe with someone who isn’t Ridley or Ron. I miss him.
Oh, and the grownup turning into a kid stuff has never appealed to me, even when I was a kid. A good, sick comedy could be made from that constantly re-used premise, but they always go for feel-good pap.
You know what? Being a child wasn’t magical, and though I miss not having to pay bills, I don’t like back with false-sap-reverence. There are few things I’d be LESS interested in than returning to my elementary or high school years, maybe college.
I’d do large chunks of college over again for sure, but only because I’m smarter now and would’ve taken better advantage of it in many many ways.
But that’s another story.
My only exposure to Zac Efron besides occasional interview clips was about 10 minutes of Saturday Night Life and he was horrible.
Great point about the brothers Scott, Chuck. I actually am really tempted to catch this one, but am leaning heavily toward just catching the mini. The movie can only lessen the mini, can’t it? I don’t know. I’ll probably end up catching it.
Speaking of Tony Scott, saw the trailer for Pelham 1 2 3 before Duplicity over the weekend and it looks pointless and wretched. I don’t mind style for the sake of style as long as there’s something else to it. Scott should just go back to doing commercials.
Jennybee, I’m so glad you enjoy the random musical sponsors. Someone besides me has to, right??
Is Bea Arthur still kicking?
Alright, State of Play the series is my Netflix queue. The cast was too good to not give it a shot. Can’t imagine the movie version is going to be that good, but how often is it that a Brit series is made into an American film? I suppose that counts for something.
Craig, I’m sure Crank has its fans but I’m not holding it against you for mocking it. It might qualify as a guilty pleasure movie, but not for my taste.
Sleep Dealer: Just because I care about you, Craig, I read an extended blurb about Sleep Dealer. Assuming the blurb does leave minor subplots out, the basic premise of the film is still silly (and you nailed it too).
Why hire people abroad to remotely control the robots doing all the work when you could program the robots to do it themselves? It’s a weak attempt to apply the fears and realities of today’s migrant workforce to tomorrow’s expected technology. How about a future world where the migrants are replaced by robots and the migrants are sent back to their home countries, forced to live in third world poverty while wealthy nations steal their resources and exploit them politically? Seems more likely, less sexy, and just as horrific.
I hereby give the Sleep Dealer remake script to Joel. Not that it’s mine to give, but someone’s got to take control over this situation.
Then Craig and I will then start working on the sequel, where the now-migrant robots go to war with the Mexican human-cyborg hybrids the former migrants agreed to become in order to outsmart their robocompetitors in the quest for all the underpaid jobs California’s corporate cantaloupe farmers (played by remote controlled holograms generated from outer space) can provide.
Also…why keep people out if they’re just going to take the jobs anyway??? I guess so we don’t have to give them schools and social security? Or maybe the corporations are doing it secretly? I don’t know. I like to give sci-fi the benefit of a doubt ’cause there’s so much of it that stinks, but….
If I’m in the mood for a balls to the wall action movie, would you recommend I give Crank 1 a try? Sounds like if the first one is really just a redo maybe I should just check it out.
I think I’d rather see Jennybee’s movie than Sleep Dealer.
I like many of Jason Statham’s movies and didn’t enjoy Crank. It’s of the over-directed, ritalin-rushed Saw sequel variety, only in the action genre. Crank 2 looks so absurd that I might see it anyway, I love the blatant lunacy of the tag line: He was dead, but he got better.
“Why hire people abroad to remotely control the robots doing all the work when you could program the robots to do it themselves?”
It’s a labor issue. The fully sentient and independently functioning American robots deem the work beneath them. And no human Americans are interested in operating the remote-control droids given the chicken shit wages, absence of health insurance and 401k, and long hand straining hours on a console.
Oops, I skipped ahead to comment on Joel’s question and see that between them jennybee and Craig spun similarly themed Sleep Dealer revisions.
Thanks for the Gainsbourg clip, Craig. I’ll always have a fondness for the guy – his peculiarly French arty eccentricity, some wonderful songs like “Bonnie and Clyde” and “Je t’aime… moi non plus” (always makes me giggle), and the appealing character his genes lend to Charlotte’s face.
Both of those songs were finalists for musical sponsor Sartre. Have I already done a brigitte bardot clip? I can’t keep them all straight.
Thank you Chuck for not using the phrase “Action porn” because that sounds like what you’re describing.
I want to see Jennybee’s Sleep Dealer. Combining the Matrix, Terminator, and Norma Ray into one movie.
Jennybee, you’re a genius.
Craig, I propose a shift in terminology (I apologize in advance if this comment is disturbing). I think Crank 2 and all the movies of its ilk are “action smut.” Porn implies something I might willingly spend money on and possibly even enjoy. Smut implies something I’d spend money on and just feel bad about afterwards.
hahaha…that’s what my mom referred my father’s stack of girly magazines as: Smut mags.
Turns out Mrs. Kennedy was a bit of a prude.
Craig, I’m not a Zac Efron fan but I was pleasantly surprised by his appearance on SNL. I thought he was actually pretty good, and the skits were some of their better recent ones (although that’s not saying much).
Did you not see “Hairspray?”
He was well-cast in Hairspray. Maybe because his hair is kind of well-cast in hairspray, too.
“Smut implies something I’d spend money on and just feel bad about afterwards.” Lol, Joel. And thanks for the genius grant. I’m sure I’ll be about as productive with it as Caden Cotard.
If I may interject for a moment…
Craig, our beloved JB is certainly not the only one that enjoys the random musical sponsors. I do as well.
Very, very much.
No, I’m POSITIVE you haven’t done one that included the legendary BRIGITTE. I’m sure I would’ve remembered. I’m a tremendous fan.
I have a great affinity for the French chicks. We do share the same heritage, after all.
As for your lovely mom…
Perhaps she had an unfavourable opinion of your dad’s magazines because she really didn’t like him looking at other women? You have to remember. I do believe that there was nothing remotely like that for women until the 70s with the advent of Playgirl etc.
Chances are if your dad had been subjected to your mom checking out pics of buff drool worthy dudes (and their pecs, butts and packages – don’t laugh – it COULD’VE happened), he likely wouldn’t have been too jazzed either.
It’s an odd thing. You certainly don’t stop noticing other attractive people (in an entirely innocent way) once a romance becomes established territory. But significant others really don’t like to be reminded of that.
Monogamy is a bitch. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even natural. But if you have two brain cells to rub together and a reasonable amount of life experience, you have to know that it’s the only real thing out there.
I’ve always been easily distracted. But inevitably I’ll dance with the charming young man who brung me.
Photos are fine. But I outgrew all that stuff pretty young.
I’d rather have the real thing.
And if that ever gets boring, there’s ALWAYS another boy…
Yeah, this is all rather deep. Forgive me. I get like that in the morning. Particularly when I’m sleep deprived.
It’s early…
Zac Efron it will be. At 5:05 EST this evening. The kids have given me no choice!
I saw Hairspray on stage so seeing it on the screen seemed to be pointless.
I only saw SNL for a few minutes so maybe I’m misjudging him. His hair did annoy me however.
Jennybee got most of the credit because she was first to chime in Miranda, but it’s true, both you and Alison have also spoken up about the musical sponsor.
Next week just might have to be Brigitte…
Stage musicals and film musicals are two very different animals, even if one is adapted from the other.
“Hairspray” is definitely worth seeing.
Have fun with that, Sam! At least I’d rather see “17 Again” than “Hannah Montana: The Movie!”
Craig, Hairspray was actually pretty good, with a very talented and energetic cast. And Queen Latifah who pwns all – well, she pwns most. Even Zac Efron was good in it. I can see why he annoys you, given his teen idol status, but he can dance and sing. The music/lyrics of Hairspray isn’t complicated and multi-layered like the stuff written by composers/lyricists such as Sondheim, and the source material doesn’t have nearly the depth that Sweeney Todd has; despite that, the movie is as tight and enjoyable thanks to the cast.
Also, I didn’t happen to comment on this week’s musical sponsor, but as always, our host Craig shows impeccable and eclectic taste.
@Sam: Since you have no choice but to see 17 Again I thought you might appreciate this helpful advice.
Ha Alison, thanks for that link!
Well, I saw it and I am alive here to talk about it! Not so bad. It’s not CITIZEN KANE, but it’s a passable amusement, that at least doesn’t have you demanding your time back. The kids liked it, but that was expected.
Matthew, you make a very good point there, with that Hanna Montana comparison! ha!
Yeah, I know stage and screen are different, there was just nothing about the movie-musical version that compelled me to see it. I’m sure it was fine.
Are you a fan of the original John Waters movie, Craig? I saw it a long time ago but I remember it being pretty funny.
I didn’t mean it like that exactly…just that screen adaptations are often quite different from their stage versions.
For instance, I’m not a fan of the stage version of “Phantom of the Opera,” but I really like the movie.
Sorry if it sounded patronizing.
Sorry if I sounded snappy, I didn’t mean to. And you’re right, having seen the stage production is no reason not to see the movie musical.
Alison, I love the original movie.