Sean Connery in Peter Hyams' "Outland" (1981)

Outland (1981) Written and directed by Peter Hyams. Sean Connery as Marshal William T. O’Niel and Frances Sternhagen as Dr. Lazarus

O’Niel: Are you Doctor Lazarus?
Lazarus: Yes. Take two aspirin and call me in the morning. That’s a doctor joke. Are you the new marshal?
O’Niel: Yes. I’d like to talk to you for a few minutes.
Lazarus: I’ve got an alibi. I’ve got four people who’ll swear they were playing poker with me.
O’Niel: I’ve never heard that one before. That’s really funny.
Lazarus: Sorry.
O’Niel: Yesterday, a man deliberately went into the atmosphere without his pressure suit.
Lazarus: Yes.
O’Niel: Three days before that, another man cut his suit open on purpose.
Lazarus: It happens here.
O’Niel: How often?
Lazarus: I don’t know. It just happens here.
O’Niel: Why?
Lazarus: I’m not a psychiatrist. I can’t tell you why. Some people just can’t take it here after a while.
O’Niel: Did you do autopsies?
Lazarus: No.
O’Niel: Why not?
Lazarus: In the first place, the company wanted the bodies shipped out quickly. In the second place, when a person exposes themself to zero-pressure atmosphere, there isn’t a whole lot left to inspect. In the third place, you’re becoming a nuisance.
O’Niel: Yes, I know. I would like a report of all of these incidents that have happened during the past six months. I’d like it really soon or I might just kick your nasty ass all over this room. That’s a marshal joke.

4 Responses to “Outland (1981)”

  1. Excellent exchange.

    High Noon in Outer Space.

    By no means a great film, but at times breathlessly entertaining.

  2. Not a classic by any stretch, but enjoyable and the world can always use more Connery

  3. Saw this opening night and his “kick your nasty ass” line got the biggest Connery applause I’ve ever seen.

  4. Connery rules.

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