80th Academy Awards Rehearsals Monday
“I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.”

My Oscar plans are taking shape as we speak. I haven’t decided if I’m going to go near Twitter or Facebook (probably), but assuming I have WiFi at my super secret Oscar party bunker, I think I’ll be commenting live here in this space bourbon in hand. That is of course if anyone decides to turn up. Feel free to drop on by around showtime and throw in your two cents.

I promise to try and keep my bitching to an absolute minimum, but the gloves are coming off if Russell wins Best Director goddamnit.

Feel free to amuse yourself with my predictions after the jump and throw in your own in the comments section. I’ll buy dinner for anyone who gets them all right.

Picture: Argo
Directing: David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook
Actor: Daniel Day-Lewis, Lincoln
Actress: Emmanuelle Riva, Amour
Supporting Actor: Tommy Lee Jones, Lincoln
Supporting Actress: Anne Hathaway, Les Miserables
Adapted Screenplay: Argo
Original Screenplay: Zero Dark Thirty
Cinematography: Life of Pi
Editing: Argo
Costume Design: Les Miserables
Documentary Feature: Searching for Sugar Man
Foreign Language Film: Amour
Animated Feature: Brave
Makeup and Hairstyling:
Les Miserables
Production Design: Life of Pi
Sound Editing: Life of Pi
Sound Mixing:
Life of Pi
Visual Effects: Life of Pi
Original Score:
Argo
Original Song: “Skyfall”
Animated Short: Adam and Dog
Live Action Short: Curfew
Documentary Short: Inocente

8:55 Argo. Duh

8:50 DDL Bitches

8:43: JLAW best actress. SERIOUSLY?

8:35: ANG LEE BEST DIRECTOR!!!!!

8:27 Original Screenplay: Tarantino

8:23 and well she did: Argo Adapted Screenplay

8:22 Sasha leaves the room in advance of the Adapted Screenplay winner

8:17 Song: Skyfall – DUH!

8:10 Score: Life of Pi!!!! (glad to be wrong)

8:00 Screw the Streisand haters. She’s awesome

7:49 Production Design: LINCOLN!

7:34 Editing: Argo

7:24 Supporting Actress: Anne Hathaway

7:15 Sound Editing: TIE! Skyfall and Zero Dark Thirty

7:13 Sound Mixing, Les Miserables (yeah that’s fair)

7:05 So is the cast of Zero Dark Thirty gonna come out and sing too? That’s not fair.

6:59 I like Jennifer Hudson and all, but enough with the Usicalmay Illerfay, thanks very much.

6:50 Foreign Language Film: Amour

6:45 Documentary Feature: Searching for Sugar Man

6:35 Documentary Short: Inocente

6:33 Live Action Short: Curfew

6:25 Shirely Bassey! Still awesome.

6:19 Makeup, Les Miserables

6:17 Costumes, Anna Karenina

6:10 Visual Effects: Life of Pi – because you had no friggin idea Richard Parker wasn’t real!

6:08 Cinematography: Life of Pi (another one)

6:00 Animated Feature: Brave (I got one right!)

5:59 Animated Short: Paperman

5:49 Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz, Django Unchained

5:36 Kirk going back in time to save the Oscars is pretty funny on paper.

5:33 Bonus points for pointing out we’ve all forgotten Jean Dujardin

5:31 Seth Macfarlane makes Tommy Lee Jones laugh in the first minute!

5:26 – OK, here we go. My goal tonight is to keep Sasha from harming herself or someone else.

104 Responses to “The 2013 Oscar Golden Shower”

  1. Great great thread here, and congrats to Dorothy for a seemingly excellent set of predictions. Never got out of the firehouse. Too many people showed up.

    Waltz and Tarantino wins were amazing. We all figured ARGO, but were saddened to see it happen even if it’s still a very fine film.

    Too bad Riva didn’t win. Great to see Ang Lee take the director prize, as well as Danna and Miranda for same film – my #2 of the year.

  2. The Lee win makes up for all the other wins I disagree with.

  3. ABSOLUTELY!!!!

    The Lee win is cause for celebration!!! A great director’s film, and a great job of directing it.

    Most will now be coming to the conclusion that if Affleck wasn’t snubbed by the director’s branch, there wouldn’t be a backlash and THE LIFE OF PI would have won the top prize. We’ll never know of course.

    How about that “tie”? What an unlikely occurrence!

    Our pool winner wound up with 19 of 24, correctly calling Waltz, Lawrence and Lee. Two had 18 of 24. I had 16 of 24.

  4. I’ll never get 19, that is all…

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